God, I say, if there is a God,
(And Aaron says there surely is)
His surety diminishes,
What kingly power leaves all others awed.
Expound to me how Father Adam came,
Show me my carnal, fallen state,
And shamed then I can only wait,
For God with those who call upon His name.
If I’m praying to the air then still, I pray,
Should it turn out there’s no one there,
Great Spirit, if You hear my prayer,
I swear I’ll give my sins away.
I have vices I will let you take,
Trade all to know if you are real,
To sell on prospect is a deal
Not all prospective saints will make.
Thou God of those defenseless who defends
Those servants I have killed in anger
Who I now know have put my soul in danger
Forgive ruthless sins by which a king offends.
O God, if Thou shalt strike me dead then,
If this thing shall come to pass,
Lay my body here upon the grass,
But pray, Lord, raise me up again.
Aaron Nydegger—like William Carlos William, John Stone, and other poets of the past whom he admires—practices medicine full-time and poetry part-time. He lives in Layton, Utah.
